As close to daily as I can I remind myself that I am not a failure. My apartment is filled with motivational quotes and bible verses that remind me of my self worth. Pictures of my closest friends and loved ones (along with my four bunnies) also cover up much of the wall space. I can honestly look back at all the opportunities that were placed in front of me and say that I embraced them to the best of my abilities. I'd like to think I should be proud of what all I've already accomplished and what I'm doing now. I'd like to think that while I don't have my life figured out, as long as I embrace everything that God throws at me with enthusiasm and gratefulness, everything is going to work out.
Here's the thing, failure is one of two things.
1) Failure is the lack of success.
2) Failure is the omission of expected or required action.
So how do we define success? How do we define what is our expected or required action? We could turn to a dictionary yet again where success would be defined as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. However, just like with failure, there are more ways to define success. One of such ways, combined with the power of social media outlets such as instagram, has led to a semi-quarter life crisis so to speak where I struggle to be patient and I struggle with jealousy.
Keep this definition in mind as you find yourself scrolling through pictures of instagram, there's pictures of new cars and vacations. There's pictures of new houses, fancy weddings, and new parents. With the exception of a few instances where social media is used to share the progression/recovery/treatment of a disease or injury, I'm willing to bet very few people are willing to be open about the not so lavish things going on in their lives. It's not until the bad things have passed that the celebratory posts are often made.
Being completely honest, seeing the pictures of weddings, job promotions, and people having their life "together" in general isn't easy to stomach sometimes. Most days it's alright and I can understand the fact that at 23 I've accomplished some things that others haven't and that others have done things that I haven't. However, some days I let the social media get to me. I get anxious because I find myself comparing my own life to those I see on instagram. I compare myself to others in terms of relationships, wealth, "adulting" milestones, and just about everything else. I find myself listening more to the voices that say "you failed" and less to those that say "keep your head up".
Its during those days that I take extra time to talk to God, read his word, and open up to him about literally everything. Much like in Lauren Daigle's song "You Say", I'm reminded that I am not a failure, that I am loved, and that I am strong. I am also reminded that social media and others should not establish my worth or my identity - that all of that is established through Christ.
Every life is different and different degrees of adversity. Some milestones might have came easier to some and harder to others. Keep in mind how rarely that adversity is shared publicly. Realize that your successes and failures should not be determined by social media posts. Take the time to be proud of yourself and where you are right now; take the time to listen more to the voice that says "keep your head up".
